Michelle

My Alopecia Journey began many years ago, when I was 15 years old,  in Year 10 at High School. I was in the Drama Club, and one evening as we prepared for a performance, someone styling my hair exclaimed: “Oh look , you have a little bald spot right at the back of your head !” A few people laughed, including me, and I didn’t give it much thought, as it stayed the same for about 2 years.

During Year 12,  however, a few more little patches appeared, and in the year after I left school, those few little patches became many little patches, which joined together to become big patches, and I could no longer hide them with careful styling.

I wore hats and scarves to hide my patchy scalp,  and struggled terribly with anxiety and depression.

During that time, there were many lies I told myself and believed about myself and my future.

Now,  I am  43 years old, and my life is far different than I had expected it would be. Here are 10 of those lies and 10 of the truths that have replaced them.

Lie #1:  You are Ugly
Truth – You don’t fit the narrow definition of beauty held by society but you have a deep inner beauty and a kind heart.

Lie #2: You are going to be limited by this condition
Truth – You are going to have a busy, full, amazing life, travel to many parts of the world and have incredible experiences!

Lie #3:  You can’t cope with this
Truth – You CAN cope with this, day by day, week by week, month by month, year by year, until you hardly think about it!

Lie #4: You should be ashamed of your condition
Truth – This is not your fault, bad things often happen to good people, and sharing with others about our own struggles often builds closer relationships.

Lie #5: No one could possibly understand how you are feeling
Truth – There are a lot of people out there of all ages and walks of life who have Alopecia and understand your feelings.

Lie #6: You will always feel lonely like this
Truth – During your travels,  you will discover that you have a gift with people and can connect across cultural and racial barriers. You will make a lot of friends all over the world.

Lie #7: No man will want to marry you
Truth – you will fall in love and marry your best friend, a wonderful hardworking man, when you are just 24 years old, and despite the very high rate of break-ups in cross-cultural relationships, you will still be happily married almost 20 years later!

Lie #8:  You won’t have children
Truth – Alopecia had no ill effects on my fertility, and I have 5 children who fill my heart with joy, hands with work and home with mess on a daily basis!

Lie #9: This is the hardest thing you’ll ever go through in your life
Truth – You will go through other difficulties, losses, stresses and pain, but you will have developed the inner strength and mental strategies to deal with them!

Lie #10: Life isn’t worth living
Truth – LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL! It is an adventure so worth living!!